I Did See The Good Things

You said that I only saw the negative in what you and I had. That’s not true.

I love how you insist that the food court is your favorite food option in the mall just so you can claim that you’re not high-maintenance, even though you didn’t even have an idea at first where it was.

You are one of the very few people who can put up with me when I’m shopping. Heck, even my mom loses her patience with me.

I love how your default voice and speaking pattern is very baby-talk-ish. I am really a sucker for that.

I really appreciate how you took care of me when I was sick. You came for me even though you were not supposed to be with me that night. That was when I started falling for you.

You are really, really, really cute. I’ve had a crush on you since the day I first saw you. That hasn’t changed one bit.

You are always level-headed and can always pacify me when I’m angry. I’m sorry, though, because I should have worked on that more. You got more blows than you can take.

I’m sorry that I wasn’t more appreciative of your effort to clean my dumpster of a unit. I’m really sorry. Thank you for doing that. I saw how concerned you were for me.

I always long for your hugs and your kisses. That’s why I always want you to stay in my place, just so I could fall asleep with you in my arms, and then wake up to your kisses the next morning.

I didn’t tell you these things because then I’ll be admitting how crazy I am for you, and I know that you’re not yet ready to commit. You are a really great guy. And I was just so frustrated that you were not mine.

I just didn’t want to dwell on the good things too much, because if I did, and you decide that I’m not the guy you want, then I’d be left in an even more pathetic state.

But I did see them, the good things we had and those we could have had.

I wish you could have given us a chance. And I wish I could have been more patient.  And I just really wish you were mine.