Thursday, August 23, 2012

All About Chemistry

His name was Enzo. Or at least, that was what he told me. And for twelve hours, he was mine.

We met in a threesome; hours on hours of sex. Then the third guy had to leave early and we were left alone in the motel room. I was wary of him at first, aware that he was far more experienced at this than I was. I knew that he could effortlessly pull my strings with his charms. But I took a chance anyway. He was a challenge, a mystery that I wanted to figure out.

Our time in the motel room ran out and we had to leave. We were supposed to go our separate ways, until I happened to mention something that got us back in our groove: breakfast.

“I’m not wearing my contacts right now, okay? So help me with the menu,” I whispered to him as we approached the fastfood counter.

“Okay, what do you want?” he asked.

“Well, obviously I want you,” I answered. I turned to look at the cashier and saw that she was smiling. I asked, “Do you have anything that tastes as good as him?”

“Ang kulit mo!” Enzo laughed as he pretended to punch me.

We spent the next hour laughing at each other’s jokes, listening to each other’s stories and blushing at each other’s compliments. I learned that he used to be the manager of a high-end restaurant, that he lost almost everything he worked for after making some bad decisions, and that he was now doing his best to get back on his feet. He told me about how he lost all his friends when he was at his lowest, and about how he met a guy who stuck with him and helped him rise back up. I was listening to his every word, clinging to them like a child listening to a fairy tale.

When he suggested that we have a second round of our sexcapade, I readily agreed. We went to a different motel. We rented a room, dropped our bags and rested a bit. Then we went back out to buy some stuff that we needed.

“How much lube do we need?” he asked, crouching down to the bottom shelf with the condoms and lubes.

“I dunno. Eight? Just so we’re sure,” I answered, kneeling beside him and counting out the small blue packets.

Then he tugged at my sleeve and motioned around us. People were looking, of course, some out of disgust and others out of interest. We just laughed and went to get the other stuff we needed. Condoms, water, energy drinks, some biscuits – it was a strange grocery list.

We were on our way back to the motel when we passed by some street food. I slowed down and looked longingly at the kwek-kwek and isaw displayed on those shabby carts.

“Aw, gutom pa ang baby,” he laughed. Then he bought a couple of everything and we ate them all by the sidewalk. He looked really cute as he wolfed down his kwek-kwek and kikiam. I remembered when I saw him for the first time and thought that he was too high-end even for Jollibee. Apparently, I couldn’t have been more wrong.

We went back to our room and shared a few more kulitan moments as we showered and prepared our stuff. He gave me tips on what to do later, and on my trysts after ours. He’s a pro indeed, I realized, and I wondered if I could keep up with him.

Then we were back up in the clouds, soaring and piercing through the sky. I lusted for him like I have never lusted for any other man. His body fit perfectly with mine. He was my fantasy and he was all mine for the taking. Hours passed and yet we were still exploring, devouring each other’s bodies. We rose higher and higher until we reached the peak together.

We lay spent on the bed, hands held. I watched him as our breathing started to slow down. I got really lucky with this one, I thought to myself. Then all too soon, he pulled his hand from mine and started texting.

“Galit na siya sa akin. I have to leave soon,” he said.

“Your mom?” I asked.

“My boyfriend.”

His words pinched at my heart. Of course I knew that he was going home to someone else. I just didn’t think it would come crashing down that soon and that fast. I realized that at the back of my mind, I was wishing that he and I would have more breakfasts together, go to the grocery store with a list that didn’t include condoms and lubes, spend another afternoon being silly at the street food carts, and then go home at the end of the day with our hands held.

Ang tanga ko lang. I’m still just a rookie after all, and I made the mistake of trying to keep up with a pro. I should have known that at the end of the day, the only things I’ll be going home with are empty tubes and bruised arms.

Love, sex and relationships, they’re all about chemistry. A chemistry that is built up and nurtured over time has the capacity of sustaining a connection for a long time. But when it’s rushed and forced into you, it fades just as fast as it comes.

“Let’s go,” he said after we finished packing up. “Are you sure you’ll be alright? Can you go home alone?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I smiled.

“Okay. Til next time,” he said. He kissed me on the lips and then went out the door.